Now some of you may say, "ewww why would you use someone else's toothbrush, that's gross!", but to you I say fuck off. He's my husband, my fucking HUSBAND. The man who has witnessed/seen/touched (whether accidental or not) every single bodily fluid I could possibly excrete/spew/gush ever. He has wiped my vomit off of a toilet seat, washed my shitty pants after a day of being awful bad sick, and has dealt with my sweating issues since forever. So why the FUCK does he have a problem with me using his toothbrush?
Now I admit, I'm a chewer. I do waste toothbrushes in no time. And maybe my husband has a sparkly purple toothbrush. And I can imagine that maybe he has grown an attachment to said toothbrush. So yes, that should trigger some annoyance; yes, that I can understand. But it's.a.TOOTHBRUSH! Technically, we are losing toothbrushes at the exact same rate regardless of the toothbrush I use, so why should it matter?
Is this a dominance issue, because I am constantly organizing his shit and maybe we have different operational definitions for the term "organize"?
His definition of organize: Pile shit in corner of room, regardless of room.
My definition of organize: Put shit where it goes. Can now walk in house without killing self.
And so his constant complaint is "stop fucking up my shit!", when I'm all like "you mean our shit?" so maybe that's why he hates me using his toothbrush, because using his toothbrush = "fucking with his shit"? We have debated many nights over this topic, and we just can't seem to agree.
Honey: I love you. Don't kill me :) Rum! ............(Don't ask.)
And so I pose to readers:
Do you have the toothbrush debate at your house? What color is your toothbrush?
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